Rum Holiday
Beyond The Stockade There Is Chaos And Nothingness

Friday, July 18, 2003  

You know what? I did get something accomplished but you're not gonna see it.

Not yet. I decided once I was going that I want to work on it some more, but I don't want to work on it here at work. I have a beer in my hand and ten minutes left before I can go home and Doug & I can try our new tennis rackets, and I got something accomplished so it wasn't a completely wasted exercise.

And the only way it's really gonna bother you is if you have been following along and came back just for this, which I know you didn't.

Some people are confused about how I know these things, about how I can be so sure. Those people are destined to be confused about a lot of things, forever.

posted by [AOK] | 4:59 PM

Benthamometer (newly recalibrated!): 9

My fiction is sporadic and mostly lame, I know, but it's not because I don't work at it. Well, sometimes it's because I don't work at it. But that's not the case today. I did work at it and I'm just trashing it. This one, trash. Complete and utter trash. It started off kind of funny but it went nowhere. NO-WHERE. It went in the trash, where it belongs.

And I was so hoping to get off this lame post slide I've been on. I'm slacking, man. I prefer to blame something and/or someone other than myself so I do. It's not important what, or who, just know that it is.

OK, here's what I'm going to do. I will spend the next hour writing something. At the end of the hour I will post it, no matter what. Finished or not, crap or not.

One pile of unfinished crap, coming up...

posted by [AOK] | 3:57 PM

Thursday, July 17, 2003  

OMG so like nobody is entering my contest. That's fine, really it is. It's really you who's missing out, you know. YOU. Are you all just scared to be wrong? Afraid I'll snort derisively at your pitiful attempt to prove that you can actually win at something in this lifetime? Well I have news for YOU. I snort derisively at you anyway. All the time.

Yes, YOU.

I'll just keep the excellent prize you would have won. It's really excellent. It looks better on my desk anyway.

I've actually had a request or two for more Smash Or Trash from the Midsummer CD exchange. So without further adieu:

Belle And Sebastian: If You're Feeling Sinsiter
Courtesy of: Leonard

Smash! Hooray! I dig this record. It's kinda quirky/folky/catchy and it made me smile right away. I've listened to it twice already. They're a band that was always kind of on the periphery of my awareness radar but I've never actually heard them. So, now I have.

Kid Koala: Carpal Tunnel Syndrome
Courtesy of: Leonard

Smash! I need to give this one another listen, but I'm placing it tentatively in the 'Smash' column. This one I liked more than Doug did. It's kind of arty and fun and silly in places. It's a genre I haven't had much contact with.

Christian Death: The Heretics Alive
Courtesy of: Drew

Trash! I'm really willing to give them another shot, because the problem with The Heretics Alive is that it is, well, live. It's mixed poorly and apparently there were lots of people on stage while they were trying to play. I was never really very appreciative of the whole goth/metal thing, so I'm skeptical that a different album will give me a different opinion, but the point of this exercise is to hear what the giver wants you to hear and it seems like this CD is better suited for an established fan. So, it's tentatively in the Trash bin because I think I can guess which way the wind is blowing, but who knows? Maybe I can be convinced.

More to come on Smash Or Trash. We received one from Cole and we're expecting two this weekend, PLUS we haven't heard the last of Leonard.

What fun!

posted by [AOK] | 2:54 PM

Tuesday, July 15, 2003  

Weather: Hot, humid, sunny
Benthamometer: 10

We had very excellent thunder & lightning storms last night. Very excellent.

I'm debating adding an indicator or two to the Benthamometer, because it's not really accurately reflecting the rage I'm surpressing at the moment.

When I am very, very angry I talk to myself. Out loud, walking down the street, to my reflection, in the car, doing the dishes, everywhere. I'm so grateful for the invention of those little earphone cell phones because even though I don't own one I no longer am nearly as self conscious about this as I once was.

It's so lame to complain about family because jeezus, they're family and if you didn't know they make you insane already then when did you think you'd find out? I was reminded the other day that distance does not equal immunity (though it insulates rather well), and the impotence in my ability to deal with it caused all kinds of other surpressed flashes of rage to flare up. It's stupid. But I am talking to myself constantly, all day long, and I'm tired of listening to it.

So, the recalibration of the Benthamometer will take me at least until tomorrow. Gotta give that some thought.

It's kind of a drag that nobody could view the field input results from my contest, so here is a contest for second place, the prize for which I have not decided yet...

Get Lucky With Andrea Part 2: Your Luck Never Really Runs Out
Below are my favorite entries in the "flattery" category of Get Lucky With Andrea (Part 1), and the code names entered for each. Match each entry to the correct name AND tell me which one is my favorite, and I'll, uh...I'll think of something. You won't be sorry though!


1. You run the meanest poker game this side of the mississippi and if I wasn´t so stuffed with chicken I would have realized that there was a worse hand than the one I was holding.

2. Amazingly, her nether regions smell like corn chips. Which doesn´t sound like much until you realise that some people´s smell like dead cats or week-old beer.

3. them´s some lovely shoulders ya´ got there, mam.

4. You sound like you would be delicious with a coke vacation.

5. good cook. strong lungs. runners legs. knows the dirt.

6. You are a brilliant and sharp ex-Marine who almost never accidentally deletes my contest entries.


a. mckennl
b. Toy Man
c. ludickid
d. fool's guinea
e. Alan Berks
f. The Administrative Assistant

Ready to play? Click on "comments" and enter your guesses thusly:


Goodness, almost time to go home for today. It's movie night for us. Last week it was Phonebooth and Secretary. I was disappointed with Phonebooth (despite Kiefer's sexxxy voice). I thought that there would be more to it, a bigger twist, a more complicated plot. Some parts were clever, Colin Farrell was ok, but it just didn't do it for me. It didn't suck, but it wasn't great. The audio sounded really good on my DVD surround-sound.

Secretary was cute in places but ultimately a let-down as well. OK, so two damaged people find each other and somehow the balance of their eccentricities allows them to live an outwardly functional existence. Fine. But ultimately I felt like I was having the idea pushed on me that normal-looking people could be finding fulfillment leading a secret life of S/M, and that was supposed to be a huge surprise, and that's kind of a huge yawner. So what? I could be wrong, but that's what I took away from it. If there is more to that movie then fill me in.

Crap, it's 5 and I just got a work-related email. I think tomorrow is the appropriate time to deal with that.

posted by [AOK] | 4:48 PM

Monday, July 14, 2003  

Weather: Bee-You-Tee-Ful
Benthamometer: 10

I had a whole new edition of Smash or Trash here, but then my computer froze and I lost it all. Crap. I really hate that.

We've had some successful reactions to music that we've handed out. Mike Watt: Contemplating The Engine Room, for instance, was a huge hit. So much so that I've had three people separately mention that this album has been played for them (by the person we gave it to) and they all love it too. That's so great. And you know, when we first got the album we were disappointed because we had just seen the show at the Metro, and the show was 10x better than the album. But without a doubt the album stands on its own, and I'm pleased that the recipient is so happy with it he gave me free margaritas Saturday night.

The other big one was The Shaggs: Philosophy Of The World. Our bass-playing German friend was more fascinated than in love with it, I think, but here's what he said: "I have a friend in Germany and he has 5,000 CDs, but I guarantee he doesn't have this one. I am sending it to him tonight."


I like this game!

posted by [AOK] | 3:35 PM
hook me up
talk to me
take me back